Sunday afternoon and I’m sitting in my other half’s garden with his family and best friend. For some reason, I can’t remember why, the topic of conversation turned to Taylor Swift. I tried to suppress a groan but unfortunately this time it slipped out.

“What is it that you’ve got against Taylor Swift?” my significant other asks.

It’s a good question. And one that I really couldn’t answer on the spot. I’ve been plagued with this conundrum for quite a while and on occasion have found myself staring into oblivion as I try to fathom why I just can’t get on board with ‘good ol’ TayTay'.

In all honesty her kooky country star turned perfect pop princess persona just doesn’t sit right with me - and I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one. She makes me feel uncomfortable. There’s something about her pristine girl-next-door image and teenage cult following that to me just seem fake.

Although this wasn’t always the case. I remember my 16-year-old self performing Love Story at a charity concert, internally dedicating it to that guy I loved so much. I found the lyrics relatable. They made me feel that I would eventually be with that guy that I loved so much and everything would be sunshine and rainbows and picnics in the park. It was, for a while, then he dumped me.

Of course Ms Swift was also not immune to the reality that is a break up and as she grew up and inevitably felt that torturous feeling of being broken up with, she penned songs to reflect this. And another. Then another. Now, let me just say I’ve been through my fair share of breakups but TS just takes this to a whole new level. At first it was funny. But honestly how can a girl have so many breakups. I found her songs to be self pitying, playing a victim, writing song after song about her exes. We’ve all been there love. Cry me a fucking river.

How long will this last?

With each mundane, generic break-up song came another boy, lad, guy, man. Whether it be Joe Jonas, Harry Styles, or Ryan whatshisface. Not any boy, lad, guy or man though. Each a celebrity in their own right - each furthering Taylor’s courting with the media. Hello attention whore. Right now she’s shacked up with arguably one of the most in demand actors, Tom Hiddleston. How long this will last? When he fades out of the limelight who will she opt for next? Let’s take a look at the Hollywood’s rising stars lists and place our bets shall we?

To me it seems that young females can relate to Tay-Swift because they’ve been through a break up. Whether he was controlling, clingy, or it just didn’t work out, girls can relate because, yes, you guessed it, Swifty has been there first. And as for guys remember she’s a self-confessed nightmare dressed like a daydream (don’t worry I can use that sentence - she hasn’t copyrighted it) - please don’t kid me that you’re wrapped up in that she’s messed up in a good way. No. She’s clued up and she’s playing you for a fucking fool. You moan that nice girls don’t exist and if they do they overlook you. Get your head out of Taylor Swift’s arse and look around you.

But, the thing that really riles me about Taylor Swift is her completely inappropriate take on feminism. I’m actually ashamed to share the word with her. Search #squadgoals on Twitter and there you’ll find her and her pals - all white, pretty and thin. Bore off. Last time I checked feminism wasn’t collecting attractive females and parading them as trophies in a #selfie. For clarification feminism is far more that female solidarity. She’s all about equality? Just take a look at her music videos. Her cultural appropriation demeans black women. Yep - that’s a feminist right there.

Correct me if I’m wrong but to me Taylor Swift is an artificial narcissist.